Alternative Careers in Parallel Universes

Friends, you might not know this, but before I took upon me this self-claimed trinity-mantle of the creator of confidence, the preserver of team-spirit and the destroyer of limitations - I actually thought of choosing other professions.

What follows is a tale of what could have been.

One of the possible futures that strongly hurtled towards me - as a truck hurtles towards a hapless dog on Grand Trunk Road, yet - twisted and turned in the intercourse of fate and destiny.... alas.... bypassed me - as a local bus or train bypasses the timid could-have-been passenger.

First, of course I decided to be an astronaut...

This was till one day Professor Pathak proclaimed in the physics lecture:

Since by now, we have covered the three laws of Keppler and the three laws of motion, we will go forward and discuss the three laws of thermodynamics but not without discussing the Schrodinger (with two dots on top of 'o') equation, all the while remembering the Heisenber
Uncertainty principle which says the position and speed of an atom cannot be ascertained with complete certainty... okay guys?"

As my colleagues licked their their lips, and took furtive notes... I had a strange spiritual experience. I felt I was floating somewhere between clouds, the stars looking at me with beseeching eyes and laughing... "astronaut"... heh heh... they seemed to say... sounds
similar to ass-through-knot ... isn't it!!

It was then, that in a burst of inspiration... I decided to be an actor....

The drama, the ability to wear numerous masks in a day, the ability to bring forth a myriad of emotions, the sheer love of performance... attracted me towards the profession of acting (er.... did I mention pretty girls, crazy money and raving fans?)

This I pursued with dedication. Unlike the other attempt, this idea was carried from the stage of ideation to action.

After several profound roles in different plays in a time span of 10 years, in which I played a bus-passenger (once) , a table (14 times), a chair (7 times)... on deep introspection - I realized one day that my talent might not be getting the due it deserves...

When I brought up the topic casually for discussion with my play director, he convinced me that he was such an excellent director - he could get a rock at end-point to emote....... but not me.

If I wanted to stay in acting... I must learn to carefully observe trees, plants, tables and chair... coz' those are the only roles I am ever going to get....

I realized it was time to say goodbye to acting before people began to realize that guy playing the part of the table was not doing it really well.

A could-have-been-legend bowed out....

Next I decided to be a poet...

The sheer art, the sheer rhythm, the sheer music, the sheer symmetry
in poetry excited every fiber in my body...

Excited, I sat down to pen the words that would make me famous... and a hundred years into the yonder... students would read poems written by Keats, Wordsworth, Abhishek and Tennyson....

I wrote down the first line of my soon to be eternal poem, which I reproduce here (copyrighted and all that, by the way!!) ....

THE POEM!!!

There is no word that rhymes with orange...
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Three hours and a severely scratched head later, my career as a poet was over.